The year of living recklessly: an update & forecast

Dear all,

I've missed you, and (rather surprisingly) I've happily discovered that some of you have missed me too.

Late last year I declared that this would be the year of living recklessly, and after having said this with such certainty to all of you I feel obliged to give an update.

Since we last talked, these things have happened (roughly in this order):

• 4 months ago...My camera broke (a significant contributor to the lack of blogging - no photos = little inspiration to write). I would like to attribute this to a particularly reckless act, like swimming in the duck-pond at 3am in the moonlight just because I could, however I think that it just grew old, filled with sand and water after too many adventures and gave up. Today's pictures are brought to you by my flatmate's camera.
  

• 3 months ago...After having thrown in my old job, I landed a contract at the Sydney Royal Easter Show (Australia's largest event! and, according to Wikipedia, the sixth largest event in the world). I watched children plunder showbags, herded cows and also an escaped and angry pig, learned an excellent lime cordial recipe*, followed a trio of ducks with more dress options than even I have, pushed a pirate around on a trolley, ate half my weight in Show food and then drank myself green on closing night.
  

• 2 months ago...Molly & I (plus a rather nice man) moved out of the lovely home that we have shared for over 3 years. It seemed reckless and daring at first until I realised that after campaigning so hard for the change I moved us into a brilliant new place only two streets away from the old place, still within the same tiny suburb, and into the equivalent room (upstairs, front of house) - all these terraces are laid out the same. This particular terrace, however, sits higher on the hill, meaning more light in our room, and said light-filled room also has (joy of joys) an ensuite bathroom and built in wardrobes. Not one wardrobe, but two. That is one each. Words cannot sufficiently express the delight.

Pretty new room (plus kitten, if you look closely)



Pretty new flatmates outside the new house, living what a passer-by described
as a "charmed existence"

Molly, quite content in her new home, although not ready for her close-up

• 1 week ago...I turned a year older and largely tried to pretend that it wasn't happening as I felt I didn't have the time, then threw a cheese & cocktails* thing at the last minute when I realised that it would be a year before I could celebrate my birthday again.
  

• Yesterday... I bought a pair of delightful boots. Recklessly expensive (*congratulates self on use of key word*) but beautiful. The camera, and my leg, don't quite do them justice.

• Today... I blogged, instead of churning out more job applications. And galloped, instead of walking, around the house. Galloping lifts the spirits and distracts from more serious things, like job applications.
  

• Tomorrow...will be the beginning of the end of my employment, as my contract ends at the end of the week. In suitably reckless fashion, I have nowhere to go. In a style somewhat less reckless, my impending unemployment is troubling me and nights at my place frequently end with a significant amount of foot-stamping and a tirade about how I don't want to write any more answers to selection criteria.

• In the next 8 months...I will possibly do any, or none, of the following things: start one of the million craft projects stowed under my bed, skydive, sew, start a street festival, stop eating chocolate on a daily basis, drop everything and visit Canada using the power of Mastercard, write more often, be a little less of a 'fraidy-cat and start singing along whilst I learn to play guitar, join a burlesque troupe or start working as a film extra.
  

And that concludes today's update and forecast for the remainder of the year ahead. As you can see, I'm about as reckless as your nanna, or on the recklessness meter, I'd rate somewhere around 'Probably still pays for virus protection software when it can be downloaded for free'.

Until next time, when I think of something inane to ply you all with!

*Lime cordial and cocktails piqued your interest? When I started blog writing I promised myself that I would include something useful for the reader in each post. So this is the useful part.

The lime cordial recipe I learned is on the CSR website...right here...you can use regular sugar if you prefer, you will just need to double the quantity.

The cocktails recipe that I came up with is just an elaborate version of the cordial above. This served approximately 20 people, and made quite a nice non-alcoholic punch for those who prefer it that way.

You will need...

15 limes, juiced (save skins!)
2 punnets of strawberries, crushed with a fork
1 1/2 cups of raw sugar
1/2 L water
dash of Angostura bitters

3 L sparkling mineral water
2 L ginger beer
spirits of your choosing (vodka and gin were good, pimms was excellent)
ice, ice, ice

The how to...

1. In a large saucepan, over a gentle heat, combine the lime juice, raw sugar and Angostura bitters. Stir until the sugar has dissolved. Slowly add the 1/2 L of water as/if required to help this process along.

2. Add the mashed strawberries and remaining water, and let the lot simmer until you have a light syrup mixture. This took about 15 min over a gentle heat, but needs watching otherwise you will end up with something that looks more like jam than something drinkable. Turn off the heat and let it cool for 10 min.

3. Take a jug, add a handful of lime skins and then tip in about a fifth of the syrup. Let it stand for another 10 min to cool if it needs it.

4. Add a scoop of ice to the jug, then top it up with chilled sparkling mineral water and ginger beer - I used about 3 parts sparkling to 2 parts ginger beer, but you can adjust this if you prefer it more or less sweet.

5. Drink! It's nice to leave the jug un-spiked so anyone wanting something non-alcoholic can partake and everyone can choose their own alcohol. Tip a shot of whatever you want into your glass and then fill up with the cocktail mix.

2010: the year of living recklessly

After careful consideration, I have decided that 2010 will be the year of living recklessly (obviously the careful consideration and reckless bits are somewhat at odds, so reckless behaviour will commence after that last careful consideration).

I've taken the first step. My contract at work has just expired, and they kindly offered to make me a permanent member of staff. My stomach sank, my marrow screamed 'no'and two weeks later I said no - somewhat less emphatically than my marrow had. Significantly less emphatically, actually, as they weren't quite convinced that I had resigned. It took two tries and that letter to leave.

I don't ordinarily follow/pay attention to/place significant weight in the words of horoscopes, except, of course, when they match up with what I want. But a colleague, upon hearing that I was departing, emailed me a rather detailed description of which moon is moving through which sign, who is orbiting who and so forth (all sounds a bit rude really), the short of which is that apparently this is a time when we can expect radical change. Rather accurate really. And not just for me, either. The fortune of Mr Anti Choice himself, Tony Abbott, for example, has vastly changed. Those ears were just meant for politics and newspaper caricatures.

So, universe, I have opened up a giant and expensive chasm in my life. Now if you could please oblige by sending something radical my way, I'd be most appreciative.

Since it's not quite 2010, the recklessness is quite tame at this stage. This weekend's act of recklessness is to pulp three perfectly lovely mangoes and risk spoiling them for the potentially happy outcome that is sorbet. The other potential outcome, of course, is sad and ruined mangoes that would have been wonderful just as they were until I got all reckless on their loveliness. On reflection, this could be a terrible allegory for what I have just done to my employment prospects: pulped.

If you would like to pulp things I would recommend starting with mangoes before chucking in your job.

This is pretty much a Tessa Kiros recipe, from Apples for Jam (I've just used a little less sugar).

What you'll need...

2-3 ripe mangoes
1/3 cup caster sugar
juice of 2 limes
grated rind of 1 lime

The how to...

1. Peel the mangoes and chop the flesh into small chunks.
2. Tip the mango into a bowl with the rest of the ingredients, then stir and cover. Leave overnight - this draws out the mango juice.
3. The next day, blend until smooth. Sieve the mixture if it is stringy. You can add sugar a little at a time if you like, for more sweetness.
4. Top up with water to make about 2 cups of mixture and then pour into a container with a lid. Stick it in the freezer. After an hour, pull it out and give it a whisk then put it back in the freezer for a couple more hours, before pulling it out to whisk again. When it is nearly firm, pull it out for one last whisk then leave it in the freezer to set. If you have an ice cream maker you can circumvent the in/out/whisk thing.

Will post a picture tomorrow if it turns out pretty. This is supposed to serve 4-6 people, but I'm inclined to thinking that on a hot day it is enough to make one person very happy.

Dear Kate Moss,

Regarding your recent comment that 'nothing tastes as good as skinny feels' (Women's Wear Daily, Fri 13 Nov), whilst I appreciate that you have founded your career on being a controversial angular waif, I would like to suggest - ever so politely - that you are wrong.

I think that the pro-anorexia critics have covered this sufficiently from a health perspective in the last few days, so I don't plan on rehashing that part of the debate.

From someone who knows, I would like to offer a list of just a few things that taste better than skinny feels.

1. Green & Black's Organic Chocolate

Their milk chocolate is to die for. With a higher cocoa content than your average chocolate, it is the perfect compromise between milk and dark chocolate. Every good supermarket will stock it.

How to eat: share it whilst chatting on the couch with your girlfriends.

2. Anything from Sparkle Cupcakery

The fittingly festive iced pumpkin cupcake is amazing. I'm going back to try the lavendar and honey, and lychee and rose. Don't even try to stop me.

How to eat: when a lovely man picks one up for you and brings it home in the late afternoon in the gorgeous thick paper bag as a surpise , risk spoiling your appetite before dinner and share it. Then eat dinner.

3. The freshly made eggplant, onion and roasted almond ravioli from The Pasta Gallery

You can buy it on Saturdays from the Eveleigh Market, or pick it up from their kitchen, or wait for delivery day.

How to eat: have dinner with the man who surprised you with a cupcake. I cooked it up and served it with a butter, lemon juice and sage sauce, tossed with finely sliced zucchini and fresh spinach and rocket.

4. Breakfast at Cafe Giulia on Sunday morning

Eggs scrambled with haloumi, mint and tomato and served with kefte, or smoked salmon rosettes with hash browns, perfectly poached eggs, spinach, lemon, and some kind of delicious mayonnaise type condiment - these are just two of many offerings.

How to eat: a knife and fork will generally see you through. Nab one of the bigger tables in the courtyard and fill it up with your nearest and dearest. Don't forget the coffee.

5. Lemon Calippo

Icy, lemony confectionary goodness. 99% fat free - Kate, I promise that the odd one of these won't have you out of your skinny jeans anytime soon.

How to eat: wait for a hot day then embrace your inner five year old - run off the beach, skip up to the nearest corner store, tear off the foil, slurp away and definitely don't share this one.

So perhaps enjoying food means I won't be starring in a Yves Saint Laurent mini-movie (and yes, Kate, congratulations are due, you do look unrealistically and unattainably beautiful) but it certainly tastes better than skinny feels.

With kind regards,

A happy girl at a healthy weight

P.S. I've included a gorgeous vintage advertisement titled 'If you want to be popular, you can't afford to be skinny'. Just something you might want to think about...

Stabbing it out in the kitchen with Jack and Jill

For the first time in my vaguely grown up life, I am celebrating All Hallows' E'en.

As a kid we did the trick-or-treat thing - under the watchful gaze of my parents, in a clearly defined perimeter, and with strict instructions not to perform any tricks if treats weren't delivered. It was all about who could bring home the biggest teeth-rotting haul, and who could consume said haul fastest without spewing up a technicolour dream.

This year, I am celebrating with jack 0'lanterns that I have carved myself. That's right, my idea of vaguely grown up Halloween is being allowed to use sharp implements for fun. Despite the howls of the anti-America brigade, Halloween is taking off in Australia (a note for said haters: it started out as a Celtic pagan celebration, a kind of festival of the dead, not an American Hallmark card). The practically hollow 'gourd' pumpkins were stocked by Harris Farm this month, and decorations and costumes are easier to source than ever. So maybe Halloween isn't strictly an Australian holiday - but why be patriotic when there are ghouls to be scared off, cult horror to be absorbed, pumpkins to be carved and a sugar free-for-all on offer?

Should you wish to partake in the Halloween spirit, pumpkin disembowelling is a particularly festive option. And easier than you ever thought, too. The pumpkins are mostly hollow, very unlike the Australian varieties. Arm yourself with the best knife that your kitchen has (a challenge in a sharehouse, I will admit) and follow the instructions of a person who has done this many more times than I have. I would encourage you to scoop out the seeds and stringy membranes with your hands rather than a spoon, as this is much more fun. Don't forget to keep the seeds. They are damn tasty after some toasting - see my recipe below. Also, if this is your first go at carving, designs with straight lines are much easier to work with than curves.

Off with his head!

Mmmmmm, brains....

Toasted pumpkin seeds!

You will need...

Pumpkins (the Halloween kind)
Olive oil
Salt

The how-to...

1. Preheat your oven to 200 degrees, and put a saucepan of well-salted water on to boil.
2. Take the seeds that you have scooped out of your pumpkin and separate them from the stringy stuff, then give the seeds a good rinse.
3. Tip the seeds into the boiling, salted, water, and turn the heat down until the water is at a simmer. Leave it at a simmer for 10 minutes.
4. Empty the contents of the saucepan into a colander, and shake all of the excess water off the pumpkin seeds. Spread them out on a baking tray and drizzle with olive oil.
5. Pop the tray into the hot oven and keep an eye on them. They should start to brown within 10 - 20 minutes, pull them out a couple of times in this period to give the tray a shake, and then for the last time when they are toasted to your satisfaction.
6. Let them cool properly and then taste for seasoning. You can add a little more salt at this point, and serve.

A Hollywood ending

A solution for when cakes go a little wrong: stick in letter-shaped candles for a Hollywood sign effect and all the funny looking pieces will be forgiven.


This one only went wrong because I didn't grease the moulds properly. Otherwise, this is quite a good recipe - mostly because it harnesses the awesome tastebud surprise that is chocolate and chilli at the same time. You can start this recipe the day before, it can be done in two stages.

You will need...

1/2 cup sour cream
100g dark chocolate, chopped
100g unsalted butter, softened and chopped
1/2 cup brown sugar
2 eggs, at room temperature
a splash of vanilla essence
1 cup plain flour
1 teaspoon chilli powder (for an extra kick, substitute half of this with cayenne pepper)
1/4 teaspoon bicarbonate of soda
1/4 teaspoon salt

The how-to...

1.Pre-heat oven to 180 degrees and grease 6 muffin tins.
2. In a little saucepan, over low heat, stir the dark chocolate, sour cream and chilli/cayenne pepper until the chocolate has melted. Stir continuously so that the chocolate does not stick and burn. Turn off the heat and put aside for a moment.
3. Take a small bowl and line with plastic wrap, then pour the chocolate mixture in. Let it cool, then cover and freeze (overnight if you wish).
4. On the day you wish to serve the cakes of loveliness, beat together the butter and sugar. Add the eggs, one at a time, then the vanilla, and continue to beat unti incorporated.
5. Sift the flour, bicarbonate of soda and salt together into the butter mixture. Stir until combined. Divide the mixture equally between the muffin tins, and put into the oven for 12 minutes.
6. Take the frozen chocolate and cut into 6 pieces. Roll each piece into a ball and push gently into the centre of each of the semi-cooked muffins.
7. Pop the tray back into the oven for another 15 minutes - the muffins should look done, there may be chocolate bubbling out of the top. Let them cool a little in the tray before you take them out to serve.

These are lovely with vanilla mascarpone, or a little ice cream. And fancy candles if you make a mess like I did.

A feat of daiquiri proportions

It's wonderous what a group of over-confident drunks can achieve.

Look Mum, no hands!

You too can achieve this kind of science with the right amount of daiquiris. This recipe is a mish-mash of suggestions from a range of cocktail lovers and what was available in the cupboard.

You will need...

Fruit of your choice (mangoes or strawberries are the classics)
Lemon or lime
White rum (Bacardi or similar)
Dark rum (Bundaberg or similar) and/or Cointreau
Ice, and heaps of it
Sugar syrup* (or, a cube or two of palm sugar dropped into the blender each round works nicely)
Bitters
A sturdy blender

*250g of sugar into 500ml of water, stir over heat until dissolved, let it cool.

The how to...

Wash and chop the tops off the strawberries. Best to do this all in one go at the beginning, particularly if the bartender plans to join in the drinking.

Half fill the blender with ice. Add two cups of fruit, the juice of half a lemon or lime and palm sugar or a splash of sugar syrup. For the alcohol, it should be one part dark rum or cointreau to two parts white rum. It's really up to you how strong you want it, as a guide, we used six to eight shots of alcohol per blenderful. Dash in some bitters and blend.

Serve and repeat. You'll know you've had enough when there is a visible sediment-like build up of strawberry seeds at the bottom of the glass. Or when you start tunelessly belting out Beatles songs, adjusting the lyrics where you see fit.

P.S. A couple of weeks ago, I put up a post about hangovers and suggested cures. Having now truly experienced this agony, identifiable by intermittent groans interspersed with 'I will never drink again - Ever', and listening to my flatmate reverse-daiquiri in the backyard for two hours, I can now personally vouch for the soft drink method. I'm not a soft drink person, but I highly recommend the lovely organic NZ brand, Phoenix. They make caffeine-free cola and a really delightful ginger beer.

P.P.S. Mutant strawberry.

Resolving the banana issue

As a small person, aged about 5 or so, I had a playground accident that left me with a serious aversion to eating bananas the normal way.

We had one of those play frames that had a slide, a swing and some other bits and pieces contained in it. I quite liked sitting backwards at the top of the slide, with my legs resting on the rungs of the ladder, gazing at the tall sky-scraping poplar trees that lined our back fence and contemplating the kind of things that five year olds do; were there enough spangles on my dance concert tutu? How did my Barbie dolls feel when I had finished playing with them and stuck them in a dark, airtight container? Did my neighbour notice that I wasn't actually listening to his battle strategies, but leafing discreetly through a nice Disney princess story instead? It was a nice place to chill.

One life-changing day, I sat in this happy place eating a banana and swinging my legs. The heels of my shoes were bouncing off the rungs. Swing-bounce, swing-bounce, swing-crash. My feet tangled in the rungs, and my body tipped forward until my forehead rather painfully connected with the bottom rung. Since then, bananas eaten the regular way bring back a disconcerting sense of concussion. I can eat them sliced on my breakfast, blended in a smoothie, mashed into baked goods, but just not whole.

A little embarrassed by not having grown out of this odd borderline phobia almost twenty years on, I hadn't shared this anecdote with my boyfriend, who buys a bunch of bananas every week. They start their life in our fruit bowl with a lovely waxy yellow skin. A couple of days later they are streaked brown and black. A few days on again, and the kitchen smells entirely of banana. Any longer and fruit flies start to swarm. This has been going on for a number of years now, we are in a constant state of banana oversupply. I usually catch them at the overripe stage and turn them into banana cake/bread/muffins, or freeze them for baking later.

This recipe for banana and walnut muffins started as Tess Kiros' recipe for banana bread; I have altered it to suit me.

You will need...

3 large bananas, mashed
2 eggs, beaten
100g butter
1/4 cup olive oil
1/2 cup brown sugar, firmly packed
1 cup plain flour
1 cup wholemeal flour
1 teaspoon baking powder
3/4 teaspoon baking soda
1/4 warm milk (soy or rice milk work quite nicely)
1/2 cup walnuts (you can use any nut you like, or chocolate if you prefer)
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1 tablespoon maple syrup (optional)


The how-to...

1. If you keep eggs in the fridge, take them out - when baking it is best to use eggs at room temperature. Preheat the oven to 180 degrees. Grab a magazine and a lemon Calippo, put on a hat and go bask in the sun for a half hour.
2. Cream the butter and sugar together using an electric beater. Whilst still beating, slowly pour in the oil.
3. Add the mashed bananas, beaten eggs, vanilla extract and/or maple syrup to the butter mixture, and whisk.
4. Sift in the flour with the baking powder and a pinch of salt.
5. Warm the milk and stir into it the baking soda. Once combined, tip this into the main mixture. Add the walnuts and stir the mixture until just combined.
6. Spoon into muffin/friand tin and cook for about 12-15 minutes (if you are making large muffins you will need longer, probably 20-25 minutes). They should be crisp and golden brown on top, and a clean knife/skewer pushed into the centre of the muffins should come out clean.

Enjoy - they are particularly good with butter when they have just come out of the oven.

Banana crisis averted.

Jam, with a side of nonsense

Having revisited Edward Lear's poem, 'The Owl and the Pussycat', I was inspired to buy a bag full of quinces on a recent shopping trip. Dining on quince seemed like quite a sweet thing to do...

"They dined on mince, and slices of quince,
Which they ate with a runcible spoon
And hand in hand, on the edge of the sand,
They danced by the light of the moon,
The moon,
The moon,
They danced by the light of the moon."

Unfortunately, the only variety of quince that I have found in Australia is rather inedible raw - too hard and sour - so I use it to make jam.

I started out with a Tessa Kiros recipe (from her book 'Apples for Jam') and made a couple of changes. At mid-August, I believe we are at the end of the quince season, so snap to it if you're interested...

You will need...
3 cups caster sugar
4 quinces
2 apples
1 lemon
a splash of vanilla essence
jars (of any shape or size) to store the jam in

The how-to...

1. Rinse the quince, apples and lemon. The quince skin will probably be a little sticky, and covered in a grey-ish fuzz. Scrub this off.
2. Quarter the lemon, and then pop it into a large pot with the quince and apples (leave these whole for now). Tip in enough water to just cover everything and then heat it all on the stove top. You want to bring the water to boil, and then to let it all simmer for about 30 minutes. Then, turn off the heat and leave it all to soak overnight.
3. The next day, drain the fruit, and keep the liquid. Peel, core and dice the apples and quinces. Squeeze the quartered lemon , flesh and all, into the reserved liquid. Discard the lemon skin. Scoop out any seeds that have fallen into the liquid.
4. Put the diced fruit back into the pot. You need to add ten cups of liquid to this. Use the liquid that you reserved earlier, and then make the rest of the quantity up with water.
5. Add the sugar and a splash or two of vanilla - the vanilla adds a toffee taste to the jam - and turn on the heat. Stir until the sugar has dissolved, then bring to the boil. Cool to a simmer, and let it bubble gently for about two and a half hours (if you like your jam runny, a little less, and if you like it really thick, a little more).
6. Whilst the jam does its thing, you can prepare the jars. Pre heat your oven to around 200 degrees. Soak them in hot water to remove any labels, and then wash the jars and their lids in hot soapy water. Rinse the soap off and then put the jars and lids into the pre heated oven on baking paper-lined trays. Leave them there for about 20 - 30 minutes, or until they are thoroughly dry. This process sterilises the jars.
7. Back to the jam. The quince will have turned a lovely ruby-red colour. Once it is at your desired consistency, turn the heat off. If you like a smooth jam, blend or mash the fruit, otherwise you can leave it as is.
8. Let it cool a little, then spoon it into the warm jars. Put the lids on the jars, then turn them over to create a seal. Unopened, this should last in the cupboard for 10 - 12 months. Once you have opened it, you will need to keep it in the fridge.


It's quite nice to make this using lots of small jars, because then you can give them away to friends. With a ribbon tied around the lid, these make quite a pretty present.

Quince jam for me, quince jam for you, quince jam we shall eat. If you like nonsense with your jam, then you can read 'The Owl and the Pussycat' (and gander at the illustrations) here. Find someone to dance on the sand with and then get your quince on!

P.S. For the Sydney-siders...if you like homemade jam but don't have time to make your own, try Paul Simon's 'Jam packed'. You can buy it from him at 324 Cleveland St, Surry Hills, or Google the name for online grocers who stock his lovely preserves.

Sweeten the deal

Come 4.30pm on a Sunday afternoon, I usually feel the onset of Monday-itis. The sun starts to set, the temperature drops, and I realise that I haven't washed my work clothes yet. Damn.

I imagine the reason that late Sunday is filled with the dread of impending Monday is that the days have struck a deal, whereby Monday takes over early from Sunday. It goes something like this, in my stress-scrambled brain... Sunday feels like she has had a damned long day - first looking out for the drunken revellers who partied on past Saturday's handover and then nursing the cursed souls through the worst of their collective hangover. Monday kind of fancies Sunday and, knowing that the early part of his shift will be quiet as the bulk of the population turns in early in preparation for the working week, offers to take over early in exchange for a date on a mutual day off.

Sunday and Monday come out of this deal warm and fuzzy, but us mere (Monday to Friday, 9 to 5) mortals don't fare so well. Which is why I propose to sweeten the deal with these here chocolate and walnut brownies. Pop a square of this in your bag for work and Monday won't seem so bad.

You will need...
150g butter
200g dark chocolate*
3 eggs, at room temperature
3/4 cup plain flour
1/2 cup cocoa powder
1/2 cup brown sugar
1 cup toasted walnuts, roughly chopped
100g milk chocolate, roughly chopped*

*real chocolate, not the cooking substitute. In Australia, the 'You'll love Coles' brand is surprisingly tasty and good value.

The how-to...
1. Preheat your oven to 180 degrees, and line a square tin with baking paper (this way, you can just lift the entire slab of brownie out once it is cooked).
2. Melt the butter and dark chocolate in a saucepan over low heat, stirring constantly. Set the mixture aside to cool a little.
3. Sift the flour and cocoa into a mixing bowl. Tip in the sugar. Beat the eggs, one at a time, in a separate bowl and add them to the flour mixture. Pour in the cooled chocolate mixture and mix everything until combined. Add the chopped walnuts and milk chocolate and stir through.
4. Scrape the mixture into the baking paper lined tin and smooth the surface with the back of a spoon. Pop it into the oven for about 30 - 35 minutes, or until set. Let it cool in the tin for about 10 minutes - this will give it time to firm up.

5. Cut it up - this recipe makes 16 neat squares - and put it onto a pretty plate. If your feeling friendly, leave it out someplace where your flatmates can find it.

You could make this with any other kind of nut - macadamias and hazelnuts go quite nicely with chocolate - or try adding a couple of shakes of chilli powder, or a splash of your favourite liqueur.

Breakfast of champions

Whilst at uni, I lived with a rather sweet guy who, despite being outrageously sociable, declined to share his treasured Saturday morning breakfast ritual with anyone. Between 9.00am and 10.00am every Saturday, he would disappear with a book to a little cafe around the corner from our place. I'm fairly sure that the staff stopped taking his order, because he ate exactly the same thing every week.

Since partaking in the rather distressing reality of full time work, Monday to Friday, 9 -5 (which, incidentally, it isn't anymore, it's more like 8 - 6), I understand his sacred Saturday routine. Lazy breakfasts at any time of the week are the first casualty when you step onto the career path. Lesson learned, I now reserve an hour or so for myself in the sunny spot in my backyard on a Saturday morning with the paper, a bottomless cup of tea and a plate of something tasty from my own kitchen. On today's menu was poached eggs with spiced beans and mushrooms on a toasted poppyseed bagel. I can't promise that Kurt Vonnegut Jr would endorse it, but it is damn tasty and makes a good start to the weekend.

Spiced beans and mushrooms

1 clove of garlic, crushed and chopped
1 tomato, diced
a handful of button mushrooms
1 little tin of mixed beans (around the 125g size)
1 tsp tomato paste
a couple of shakes of paprika
freshly ground pepper

Tip all of the ingredients for the spiced beans into a saucepan, mix well, and set over a low heat on the stove top. Let the mixture simmer for about 10 minutes, stirring occasionally. You may need to add a little bit of water to prevent the mixture drying out. This is a really flexible recipe that you can modify depending on what you have available. You could try adding chilli, fresh basil or coriander, baby spinach, haloumi, fried chorizo etc.

Poached eggs

Since this is about having a relaxing breakfast, don't go stressing yourself out over poaching the eggs. There are a couple of things that you can do to pretty much guarantee perfect poached eggs...

• A deep frying pan, or wide saucepan, is good for cooking a number of eggs simultaneously. Fill with water and set on the stove top, and bring the water to a boil. Splash in a tablespoon or two of white vinegar (this helps the eggs to hold together) and bring the water back to a simmer (it shouldn't bubble).
  
• Going one at a time, crack a cold, free range, egg into a cup or ramekin. Fresh eggs will keep their shape best.
  
• Stir the water to create a whirlpool in the centre of the pan and gently slide the egg into the whirlpool from the cup. The whirlpool helps to keep the egg in a nice shape and prevents the white from going straggly. Once the white begins to solidify, push the egg to the side of the pan, and add the next egg following the same method. If you are having any kind of bread with your eggs, now is the time to pop it into the toaster.
  
• Cook the eggs for approximately 2 minutes if you like a thick but runny yolk, and 4 minutes if you prefer the yolk hard. Whilst the egg is cooking, butter the toast and have it ready on the plate
  
• Use a slotted spoon to lift the eggs out and let the water drain off before transferring the egg to the toast. Add any sides (like the spiced beans and mushrooms) and serve, with a little freshly ground salt and pepper.

If that all seems a little too hard, you can always eat out. If you are in Melbourne or Sydney, this is a particularly good site for hunting down the best.

My big fat greek style burger

Once upon a time there was an amazing little burger place called Burgerlicious on King St, Newtown. They made seriously tasty burgers with good quality ingredients. One dark day they sold out. The lovely waitress with the same name as me disappeared. They brought in fluorescent lighting. All of the good ingredients left in protest. I thought my short-lived fling with burgers was over, until a certain someone taught me how to fend for myself with this recipe. Menfolk, take note: the way to a lady's heart is through her stomach.

The ingredients
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500g lamb mince (buy the best quality lean meat that you can afford)
1 spanish onion, diced finely
2 cloves of garlic, crushed and chopped
1 egg, beaten
1 heaped tablespoon of both mayonnaise (whole egg variety, preferably) and seeded mustard
a couple of shakes of garam marsala, ground cumin and cayenne pepper
a handful of fresh mint, chopped (optional)
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1 red capsicum
2 zucchini
1 eggplant
haloumi
rocket (baby spinach also works)
wholemeal buns (you could use any kind of bread - or none at all if that's your preference - but a bun is good for holding everything together whilst you eat it)
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The how-to

Preheat the oven to 180 degrees, or 160 degrees for fan-forced.

Mix all of the ingredients from the first section, using a large spoon, until just combined. To make sure that all of the ingredients, particularly the spices, are evenly distributed, knead and squeeze the mince mixture with your (clean and ring-free) hands.



You want the mixture to be quite sticky - you can always have your kitten come by and do a quality control inspection, Miss Molly (pictured above) is always obliging. Divide into six even pieces. Mould each of them into a palm-sized round, and don't flatten them completely. Pop them onto a grill tray (preferably a wire rack with a tray for catching the fat that will drip out underneath so that you don't make a mess of your oven) and set aside.

Slice the egglant into thin rounds and sprinkle with salt. Set aside.

Slice off the four sides of the capsicum, working around the core. Put them skin facing up onto a baking tray covered with baking paper close to the element of the oven and grill until the skin is charred and looks blistered (approx 5 min). Take out and let cool. The outer layer of the skin should come away easily. Discard this, slice the capsicum lengthways and set aside.

Slice the zucchini lengthways, into pieces a couple of millimetres thick. Rinse the eggplant, shake dry and then lay the eggplant and zucchini slices onto the same baking paper-lined tray that you used for the capsicum. Put the vegetables and the mince patties in to the oven, with the vegetable tray above the mince tray. The vegetables should take approximately 10 minutes and the lamb should take about 20 minutes. Turn the vegetables after 5 minutes and turn the patties after 10 minutes so everything cooks nicely on both sides.

Once the vegies and meat are cooked pull them out and let them rest a couple of minutes. Start to assemble your burger with some of the lovely grilled vegetables, a lamb pattie and some fresh rocket. Once everything else is ready, slice as many pieces of haloumi as you need - two per burger is about right - and fry in a pan heated with a little olive oil. You want it to be soft and golden brown on both sides. The haloumi should be left til last because it is best eaten whilst hot - it starts to harden as it cools after being cooked. The haloumi can go straight from the pan and onto the burgers.

This is lovely as is, the grilled vegies are really flavoursome and the lamb is quite juicy, but you can also add any kind of condiments that you like - mayonnaise, chutney, pesto, sauce - and then serve it up.



As you can see in the picture, this goes quite nicely with a cheeky drink or two...

P.S. Vegetarians, don't despair!

This is a good meal when you are catering for a group with a variety of food preferences. It is easy to replace the lamb patties with more of the grilled vegies and haloumi. Also, avocado, grilled mushroom and olives are good extras for the vegetarian version.